unit: properly update references to units which are merged

unit: properly update references to units which are merged

When we merge units that some kind of object points to, those pointers
might become invalidated, and needs to be updated. Introduce a UnitRef
struct which links up all the unit references, to ensure corrected
references.

At the same time, drop configured_sockets in the Service object, and
replace it by proper UNIT_TRIGGERS resp. UNIT_TRIGGERED_BY dependencies,
which allow us to simplify a lot of code.